Never let go

I don't want to graduat next year and regret something. I don't want to leave high school thinking to myself "what if". Next year is going to either be the greatest year of my life or the worst. It's a weird feeling that I have yet to experience, but I can'twait until it's here.

We'reonce again coming to an end. One more year here and gone. So far this has been the shortest, it felt like no time at all and it is over already. That's a good thing. As I talk to Hannah and Katie, two of this years seniors, I can't help but wish that this year was my year. I have so many plans that I just want to get to already. They talk about the universities that there going to attend and all the wonderful but stressful anxiety they're going through. Every single part of me wants to get out of here. I feel taht I am ready to move on.

On the last day of anything, no matter how big or small, we all have something we wish we could have done differently. I know I do. There are many thingsthatI know I would love to change and maybe life would be better if I could change them, but I can't. I'm not complaining though. Things could be worse. I have great friends, wonderful parents, good grades, inspiring friends at my co-op. Thats one thing that I would never want to change. I absolutly love my co-op. The people are amazing. They have to deal with so many things and still they are so strong. The other co-op student that works with me is great to, we have become really good friends. We laugh at everyhting together. I'm going to be really sad when it's over next week.

Another chapter of my life gone. Sometimes, despite the things we wish never happened, some things are worth holding on to. We all need to appreciate the people we know and do everything we can to love them while we have them. Everyone in our lives leave a lasting impression, and I know that there are a few people that I have in my life now that will always be very close to me.

Staring at the clock.

I am currently seeing this boy and I'm not sure what to think of it. He's one of those boys who doesn't really talk about the situation. So I've been seeing him now for two weeks. I say seeing him, but I doubt that he'd call it that. I know he likes me and all, but I'm not sure he wants to say it. We kiss eachother goodnight and hold hands, but I keep asking myself, where is this going?

I want to tell myself that it will work out, but it's hard. As much as I don't want to say this I can't help it. So here goes. When I was with my last boyfriend it was incredible, every time he touched me it was like we were starting all over and i had millions of butterflies in my stomach. He made me feel like the world was perfect and we were perfect. Even though he hurt me, I secretly wish I had those three months back because I never felt more loved. With this new boy it doesnt feel magical. I mean he makes me feel good because he is always complimenting me. I do like him and he is very fun to hangout with. Mybe I just need time to build up to that loving feeling. I mean with boy number one it wasn't an imediate feeling of love. We built up to that, so maybe with boy number two I have to do the same thing.

Lets hope that thats right because I do like being with boy number two. He's funny, sweet, and has gorgeous eyes. We love the same things, and he always want's to do what ever I want.

Please work out, please please please.
"Knock on wood"