Life goes on, right.

who does he think he is, how can he control my heart if i didnt fucking give him permission to! why cant he understand that i just want him to see that I'm still right here, and he still has my heart and i want him to take care of it or give it back.

Some guys are really stupid, they can't see whats really good right infront of them, they would rather work really hard for the shitty nothing. I mean why is that so hard, if a girl that you once liked is right there telling you that she wants you, how hard is it to want her to.

I have a problem with one guy and only one fucking guy, he is the most annoying, wonderful, sensitive, jerk I know, but i like him so much. He has been in my life for about a year, and we went through some rough patches where he basicly took my heart and stomped on it, but no matter how many times he tore me apart i still wanted him. why is that? why do you always want the guy you cant have!

He was always right there when i needed him, but then when ever i wanted him he was never avalable. I want him to realize that i am still here and I still want him and until i get him I'm not gonna stop wanting him. Whats wrong with wanting somthing you cant have? I'l tell you, it kills you until you get it, you cant help but only think about that 24/7 non-stop

We've hooked up before and yeah thats great and all, buta thats all i do, i usually just hook up with a guy then im over t. But with him it was so different, after i hooked up with him i just kept wanting him. He kept not wanting me. Everytime i told him i wanted him, he told me that he didnt want to keep hurting me so he didnt want to take the chance of being with me. So, we never went any further, so even though he was trying to avoid hurting me he was hurting me worse then he could have ever hurt me.

I still like him now, but i think now its more of me just wanting him because i never got him before. He's now just a thought that comes along every once in a while, and i guess one day I'll not want him as much.

On a more happy note i can not wait for summer to start, so i can get on with my life and start doing all the stupid stuff i like to do, like drink, drink, and then maybe drink some more. Thats how my life goes on, i have fun and forget things fast.

I also love to spend time with three amazing girls, maleeha, fiana, and san. the greatest people i know, they dont lways do the right thing but thats why i love them so much, and there perfectly perfect for me. They are the funniest, smartest, prettiest people i know and they know exactly how how i feel and when somethings wrong. Maleeha is my everything girl, she can pretty much read my mind and its creepy but amazing t know that when i cant think straight she can. Fiana is my funny be happy girl that can make me smile no matter what is going on and can be there for me when ever i need someone to be myself with. San is my go to girl, when i want someone to listen and i just need to sit and talk for no aparent reason thats when my little sunshine shows up. If i didnt have them, my life would be pretty much pointless :)

Love you guys<3